Farewell to a Friend

Yesterday, I learned that an organist who had accompanied my singing, Joe Jacobs, had died.

This blog is a thank you to accompanists and other unsung heroes everywhere.

I’ve sung with good accompanists and bad ones. When I sang with one accompanist, I felt like she was the organ grinder and I was the monkey. I followed her playing and direction. When she stopped, the monkey (me) stopped singing. Sometimes I felt like I was singing an obstacle course on a reality show, with the congregation as the viewing audience.

Then there’s the other kind. The accompanist who listens. He can spot when I’m shaky on a melody line and emphasize the melody. We would watch together to see how many verses of a hymn to sing and when to stop. We had hidden cues we both understood – when I set my hand on the side of the organ, he knew I thought we needed to finish this verse and end.  When he nodded at me, I knew to pause between verses so he could improvise an interlude.

Great accompanists are patient with singers and roll with our stumbles. Once, while I was cantoring, as we exchanged peace, I saw the priest shaking hands with my son, who was serving. I was caught up in the moment, overwhelmed with mama pride, when I heard a hissing, “Mary!” I had forgotten it was time to sing the next response. Back to the job. If I sang the wrong verse or stumbled, he added emphasis to his playing so I could get back on track.

They are also reliable. Musicians don’t have the luxury of only performing when at the top of their game. They play in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, in good times and in bad. When there was an ice storm one Christmas Eve, services were cancelled and everyone forgot to tell the organist. So he braved the slick roads and ice, arriving at a darkened church with no services, and never complained about the oversight.

When he played we had those moments when I could feel music flowing from us through a whole sanctuary.

My friend died unexpectedly yesterday. I didn’t get a chance to tell him thanks. Look around you – who do you know who’s reliable, forgiving, and empathetic?

Thank them while you can.

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God’s Got This

A miracle is like a rainbow pebble that touches a pond and spreads multi-colored ripples to distant shores.

I’ve watched one happen this week online through Caring Bridge, a different kind of social media site – one that helps families in medical crises communicate updates to friends.

Three weeks ago, Kristy, the daughter of a friend & lady I work with was hospitalized. Nothing seemed to beat her infection. Her pain grew worse as she battled endocarditis.

Her mom kept me updated through the phone and Facebook.  Kristy’s condition worsened daily.

Her friends and family came together to pray for her – and to support her husband and 2 young daughters. Last week, she was rushed by ambulance to a teaching hospital 100 miles away, diagnosed with an aneurysm, and placed in a neuro ICU unit.

Prayer chains from Kristy’s hometown to the other side of the planet prayed for her.

The prayers grew more urgent. Surgery, predicted to last 12 hours, was scheduled. Kristy continued to pray. Two days before her surgery, while in Neuro ICU preparing for the operation, she wrote a poem:

He’s Got This

I will not fear, cause God, He’s got this
I will not tear, cause God, He’s got this
I’ll share with all, cause God, He’s got this
I will not fall, cause God, He’s got this
I will praise, cause God, He’s got this
My hands I’ll raise, cause God, He’s got this
I have no needs, cause God, He’s got this
I’ll plant my seeds, cause God, He’s got this
Those seeds will grow, cause God, He’s got this
He’s in control, MY GOD, HE’S GOT THIS!!!!!!

The morning of surgery, Kristy told her family and friends not to worry. “God’s got this.”  Updates were given by way of Caring Bridges. Facebook friends and family posted updates and prayer requests.  Her Caring Bridge guestbook filled with notes from those concerned about her.

Fourteen hours later, we learned her surgery was a success.

God took a situation straight out of the valley of the shadow of death and turned it into miraculous steps climbing a mountaintop.

Though I’ve never met Kristy, through her family’s updates, I feel that I know her now.

Those who face death and witness miracles are never the same. In Kristy’s case, by way of social media, I know God’s got this and will use her ordeal for good.

She’s reminded me once again life is precious and to treasure every moment with Richard and our kids.

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The Millers – Good People Day 2010

Gary Vaynerchuk offered a challenge today – blog and tweet about good people.  We encourage as many of our friends as possible to do the same, and let’s fill the Internet bands with stories of good people doing great things in our own backyards.

Dan and Virginia Miller were my choice.  When my kids joined 4-H six years ago, they were assistant leaders of the club.  A retired couple, they stay involved in 4-H because they love kids. I didn’t know what an impact they would have on our family.  They invited us to pick cherries, corn, apples, pears, beans, or whatever was growing in their garden and ready for harvest.

When I have questions about parenting, cooking, or anything else, they always listen.  After a wind storm knocked out our power, Dan brought over a generator and hooked it up to keep the food in our freezer from growing bad. If I’ve needed help transporting my kids to activities, they are always there.

Last year, Dan and Virginia won a Mother Theresa award in our diocese for their work with the poor.  Whenever their church needs help – whether it’s fixing an industrial mixer or repairing a plumbing problem, they call Dan.  If a fundraiser needs kuchens, pies, or coffeecakes made, Dan’s right there, making 50 at a time. (He’s a retired baker.)

Virginia started a health ministry in her parish and was the church’s first parish nurse; she organizes blood drives for the American Red Cross and started monthly blood pressure checks after Masses.  Two years ago, she also helped begin a Gabriel Project, to provide services to mothers in crisis pregnancies. That project consumed hours of time on the phone, finding ways to help expectant mothers find food, housing, healthcare, education, and more.

This past year, when they were hospitalized with different health problems at different times, they were still concerned about those they helped.  After Virginia was released from the hospital, she insisted she be taken to the county fair and didn’t rest until she had seen the ribbon placings of all the kids she knew in 4-H.  When Dan was in the hospital, he explained to his priest what needed to be done to repair and check the church’s industrial dishwasher.

The Millers are proudest when they talk about their children and grandchildren, who also have hearts of servants to build their communities.

My family, my community, and my world are blessed by wonderful people like the Millers.

#gpd10

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